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17 June 2004 @ 11:17 pm
Slashy Nominations 55: The First Time He Kissed Him  
Well, the first time he kissed him and a heck of a lot else. (Sorry, Elizabeth, but if others can slash copyrighted works, I can certainly subvert your sweet little sonnet, mmm?1) In other words, it's a first times set. And, yes, first time stories are perhaps 85% of all slash currently in existence. And, yes, many people now consider such stories cliched and undesirable. I do not care. I'm a slash traditionalist, and I like a good first time story. And that's what you'll find below.

Best FF That Features Incidental Proof That Sometimes True Love Means Shooting Your Loved One: Someone Who's Turning, by Jane St. Clair, aka 3jane. X-Force, Rictor/Shatterstar, and I can't offer you bios because the site I usually use is down, dammit. There's just something so boylike about this first time, which starts with a hand job and ends with the first kiss. (All together now: awww. Or am I the only one who finds this sweet? Yeah, probably.) But what I really love about this story is that it's all about patterning - how we learn to love. And considering Shatterstar learned everything he knows about love from TV, and Rictor learned from sources that manage to be even less reliable, it's sort of impressive that they manage so well here. Hormones never lead you astray. Well, in slash, anyway. At least in certain fandoms.

Best FF That Uses Handguns (and Fear of Handguns) to Help Ease the Tension Inherent in Switching Teams: The Awakening, by Beth, aka beth666ann. Homicide, Tim Bayliss/Chris Rawls. Yes, I have succumbed to the Homicide lure. But it's OK! It's a really small fandom! I'll be done with it before you know it! Just like, um, all the other tiny fandoms I've abandoned. (There aren't any, actually, but there could always be a first one.) This is the second story I read in this fandom, and it's the best I've read so far. You totally don't need to know the canon to read this - it's basically just the most protracted first time I've ever read in slash, and I don't in any way mean to impugn the quality of this story with that summary. This is good slashing, here. Plus, it's an excellent introduction, to the extent that I am any judge, to the strange creature that is Tim Bayliss. Read it! (I need company in my multi-fandom purgatory.)

Best FF in Which We Learn the Importance of Bat-style Utility Belts to the Course of True Lust: Night Watch, by weirdnessmagnet. Teen Titans, Tim/Kon. Only Tim Drake would, upon awakening his lust object with exceedingly lustful behavior, immediately think of the knockout gas he has handy in a belt pouch. (Of course Tim keeps his utility belt fully stocked and armed while he's seducing someone! Suppose it turns out to be the Evil Kon-X from the Dimension of Deranged Sleepers? Tim would need his belt then!) Even in the DCverse, most people aren't twisted in such an anal retentive way. This first time is vintage Tim, from the creepy obsessive stalkery behavior to the careful analysis of Kon's genealogy and genetics even as he's seducing him. And that's what I love about the DCU: unabashed use of the DSM IV for character inspiration.

Best FF That Teaches Us That True Love Is All About Lies, Lies, Lies2: Believe You Me, by cesperanza. Due South, Benton Fraser/Ray Kowalski. I've succumbed, people. Rather than resist the lure of Speranza's stories, I'm just going to try to work one into every damned set until I run out. That'll solve the Speranza Problem, all right, and maybe then I'll be able to move on to recommend authors that everyone on the planet hasn't read. Seriously, my mother has probably read this one already. (Um, actually, I really, really hope and believe she has not. Because ew ew ew.) So, here we have lies and sex, and I've always loved this story because it perfectly captures the pathos of being Benton Fraser. I don't know why I didn't mention this one in the Due South Fandoms I Have Loved, because this is really the story you need to read to know why dS fans tend to be happy ending junkies. (These guys deserve the happy endings, that's why.)


1 It is not my fault I do not love Elizabeth Barrett Browning as I should. I blame my ninth-grade English teacher, who I swear was in love with the woman. (God help me - it's a plot bunny for RPS time-travel femslash. I think that's ample proof we should all be incredibly grateful I don't actually write FF.)

2 No, I do not have to mention weapons in every category title in this set. Though if I did, I would certainly point out that this story features a whole passel of law enforcement officers, all American and therefore all armed, and yet it's the only one that doesn't mention any weapons at all. We call this the due South mystique.
Sascha: god among insects - s1ster_raygreenet on June 18th, 2004 02:38 am (UTC)
Who's Rictor and Shatterstar?

With a sidedish of proof.

In case there was someone who really wanted to know who these people are. *grins* (Also, I can't resist the chance to pimp the X-Boys.)
tried to eat the safe banana: thefourthvinethefourthvine on June 19th, 2004 03:30 am (UTC)
Oh, definitely we must always pimp the X-Lads. And you, being Norwegian and all, would naturally be very good at that; in fact, I hereby declare you Official X-Pimp. Or, um, maybe not. That doesn't sound so good.

Did the Men in Black Leather Thongs come for you yet?
Sascha: john troubled - s1ster_raygreenet on June 19th, 2004 03:57 am (UTC)
*looks shiftyeyed, sits down gingerly* Uh, no... I always walk like this.

*grins* Dude, X-world has, like, canon X-whores and stuff (and also, ex-whores, come to think of it). ...I don't have a pimp!cane though. Very sad. Cannot be official X-pimp without pimp cane.
(Deleted comment)
tried to eat the safe banana: thefourthvinethefourthvine on June 19th, 2004 03:48 am (UTC)
Hope the job interview is, you know, going well. (Unlike many of the stricter fanfiction sects, I have no theological issues with delayed dances of joy. Feel free to engage in one at any time.)

The problem with Homicide fic, I'm finding, is that it's all over the map - there's no way to get a handle on the fandom, because there's no way to focus. In big fandoms based on messy canons, I simply select a pairing (often almost at random) and, if necessary, time period to focus on - pre-chip S/X, for example, was how I started in BtVS expanding to all S/X after fanofall taught me the later seasons; that way I can work through things in manageable pieces and expand my horizons slowly. But this fandom is too small for that, and I'm drowning!

Although, really, drowning in FF is a good way to go. And I must say I am very much liking the Tim, who somehow brings the angst without getting all Angel about it. (I like Angel, but I find his Big Ol' Bucket of Neanderthal Angst routine amusing. Do some yoga, man! Relax those shoulders! Learn to breathe!) I am not, at this time, so much liking FF where Tim is paired with Frank Pembleton; I just can't find anything that doesn't have that undefinable OOC feel. Got any suggestions?
What the hell is up with the mummy?!: a little bit deadlyserialkarma on June 18th, 2004 07:10 am (UTC)
I just had to say thanks for reminding me about that Homicide story. Many moons ago I went through my H:Lots phase and that story (or actually I think it's a series?) is one of my all-time favorites, ever. I'd lost track of the link to it, however, so thanks!
tried to eat the safe banana: thefourthvinethefourthvine on June 19th, 2004 03:53 am (UTC)
So you can actually depart from fandoms? Please tell me how this is done, for I desperately wish to learn.

"Awakening" is a fantastic story, is it not? Thank umbo for its appearance here; she rec'd it on crack van, and I can totally see why. It's a classic. And, yup, it is part of a series. The other ones I've found are Robbed and Action.
tried to eat the safe banana: thefourthvinethefourthvine on June 19th, 2004 06:05 am (UTC)
Arg. I meant, of course, that the sequels are Reading and Action. Memo to self: do not cut-and-paste quickly late at night. (Actually, early in the morning.) Brain shorts out, loses ability to distinguish similar words. Or, really, words at all.