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26 June 2007 @ 12:02 am
Fandoms I Have Loved 12: Stargate: SG-1  
I wanted to get this finished in time for the last episode of SG1. I, um, didn't. (I know you're shocked.) And you may wonder why I bothered to write up an introduction post for a show that a) has been around for 10 years and b) is now over.

I could come up with lots of excuses - "It's really about the fandom" and "What more perfect time to write an intro than when we know it won't be obsolete in a year?" and "The heart wants what it wants" - but, face it, they'd all pretty much suck. So instead, I'll say: that's just how I roll, people.

Plus, I love this fandom a lot. And I'm not saying goodbye to it. Not at all.

I joined this fandom after the show had been on the air for something like twenty-three seasons. (Okay, I think seven, but still.) It was like - you know how, when you're dating someone, you have the horrible moment when you go to his family's house for a vacation? Suddenly you're immersed in his entire family history, which means if you say "oranges" someone bursts into tears and leaves the table, and people say, "But seriously folks" and then everyone collapses laughing, and you set the table wrong and don't know how to say grace and you agree to play Trivial Pursuit but this family plays an edition you've never heard of and cannot answer a single question in, and you have to listen to incomprehensible stories about people who died before you were born, and you keep saying to your boyfriend, "Okay, is that Chris with a C or Kris with a K? And how is he - or she - related to you again?"

And inevitably you end up with your back against a wall, thinking that you always kind of looked down on Cliffs Notes, but if they sold them for this family, you would so buy some, and in the meantime you'd like to turn invisible, please, because these people are really nice, but you have no fucking clue what is going on, and you've reached a state of confusion so severe that it's probably causing permanent brain damage.

Joining SG1 fandom that late was kind of like that. I kept going, "But who the hell is Martouf?" and "But why do I care about this man with the banana?" It was utterly mystifying.

Fortunately, though, fandoms do come with Cliffs Notes, and also they come with porn, which - okay, we're dropping the boyfriend's family metaphor here and now before I can scar myself any worse.

Eventually, I got things figured out, to a certain extent (I'm still kind of WTF? about some things - Moebius, for example), and I found a lot of great fan fiction, so this story has a happy ending. And now I'm going to try to distill that knowledge into, you know, a single Fandoms I Have Loved entry, while still retaining my ability to form coherent sentences. Should be fun!

(But, just as a backup plan: if I lose the coherent sentences, just skip down to the links at the end.)

Things You Need to Know Before We Get Started

  1. Anything with a random apostrophe in it is alien. Unless it's in fan fiction, in which case there's a chance it's just a crime against grammar. But if it's in canon - well, let me put it this way. If "canon" was an alien concept in SG1 (Which I sometimes think maybe it is - like, have the writers seen the show? The whole show? When they weren't on drugs?), it would be written c'aan'on. (Also, it would it kill Daniel.)

    This creates some challenges. I'm pretty sure that Goa'uld is spelled, you know, Goa'uld, but Daniel's wife? Her name starts with an S and ends with an EEE sound and there's an apostrophe in the middle. That's all I can tell you for sure. I just think of her as Sherry, because that way I can imagine a Lord King Bad Vid set to a song I sometimes hear in supermarkets called (I believe) "Oh, Sherry." (The first time I heard this, I seriously thought he was singing "Oh, Sha're, with the eyes of gold," because my supermarket has not invested in high quality speakers. I nearly fell over laughing in the bread section.) Also, that way, I don't have to worry about the apostrophe, because let me tell you, that fucker wanders.

  2. No matter what happens, SG1 will do everything in their power to avoid learning any life lessons or experiencing emotional growth. They don't have time, people! You can't have psychological stability and an intact universe. That is the first lesson they teach in stargate school.

  3. In SG1, science doesn't mean what you think it means. In fact, it's best if you just kind of chuck all your science knowledge in a pensieve while you're in the Stargate universe. Just listen to whatever Sam and Daniel tell you, and believe them; they're usually right. They read the script.

  4. No matter how many times they endanger the human race, the earth, the galaxy, or the universe, SG1 are still our heroes, and we love them. Yes, we do. Yes, even when Teal'c has that tragic attack of scalp fungus.

People You Need to Know

-The Team, v. 1.0-


Job title: Cat-Herder-in-Chief.

Job duties include (but are not limited to): Saving the day, saving the earth, arguing with Daniel Jackson, not really listening to anyone but his team, making things blow up, shooting things, saying "for crying out loud," and choosing expedience over cultural sensitivity.

Sources of angst: The death of his son, the dissolution of his marriage, his forbidden love for Daniel, Sam, or Teal'c, various bouts of torture, being responsible for the deaths/misery/torture of people he loves. Basically, the only source of angst that could not be plausibly attributed to Jack is the trauma of arriving at the Prom wearing the exact same dress as Melissa, OMG!

Methods of coping: Repression, denial, sarcasm, shooting things, pretending to be dumb, pottery (no, really), annoying others.

Reasons we love him: He's Jaaaaaack. Okay, look: he's tough, he's funny, he's smarter than he wants you to know, and he cares way more than he wants to about - well, pretty much about the same things we care about: the other team members, the human race, pie.

Fan fiction notes: He is most often slashed with Daniel and shipped with Sam. And if Jack engages in any lengthy, heartfelt discussion of his feelings with appropriate "I feel" statements and sincere emotion and copious cathartic weeping, either he's been taken over by an unusually sadistic Goa'uld or you're reading badfic.


Job title: Thinky Guy. Also, Talky Guy.

Job duties include (but are not limited to): Saving the day, saving the earth, arguing with Jack O'Neill, not listening to anyone unless they're speaking an unusual language or come from another planet, providing exposition, eyebrow calisthenics, and worrying about cultural sensitivity and, you know, morals and stuff. Also, dying. I really cannot emphasize that enough.

Sources of angst: He watched his parents die when he was eight. His wife got a snake put in her head and then Teal'c killed her. His adopted planet got a boo-boo. He's got the weight of the universe on his shoulders. Also, did I mention he's died a lot? Some of those times were somewhat less than pleasant for him.

Methods of coping: Working. Working harder. Working really really hard. Sometimes I think he dies just to get a chance to put his feet up for a bit.

Reasons we love him: He is smart and caring and lets his sense of responsibility completely change him. He tries really hard. He talks really fast. He wears glasses. A lot of the time, he looks like he needs a hug.

Fan fiction notes: He is most often slashed with Jack and most often shipped with - hmmm. I don't know, actually. If Daniel is alone and unloved and everyone is mean to him and so he cuts himself (or just tries to kill himself), either he's gotten addicted to an alien substance again (in this case, probably called Emo Dust) or you're reading badfic.


Job title: Shiny, Shiny Scientist. With a Gun.

Job duties include, but are not limited to: Saving the day, saving the earth, making it very clear that she is not going to argue because she fully understands the chain of command, providing exposition, providing techno-babble, producing five technological miracles that defy the laws of physics each week, and sometimes taking orders.

Sources of angst: Well, her mother's dead, her father's either disappointed with her career choices or all snake-headed, her best friend gets killed, and her relationships are always set to self-destruct within three episodes. Plus, as one of the writers has pointed out in a commentary somewhere, she's a woman. Boobs make everything harder! (No, I'm not kidding; a writer did basically say that.)

Methods of coping: Working. Also, working on shiny things. Also, riding motorcycles. And shooting things.

Reasons we love her: She is smart and shiny. She kicks ass in the old boys' club of the Air Force. And did I mention the motorcycles? And the shooting of things? Also, she's much less likely to die than any of the other characters.

Fan fiction notes: She is most often slashed with Janet and shipped with Jack. If she gets hit by an ordinary guy and, instead of breaking his jaw, she cries and needs someone (Jack, or I guess maybe Janet) to defend her, either she has a secret plan or you're reading badfic.


Job title: Resident Alien.

Job duties include: Saving the day, saving the universe, killing the false gods, patiently not smacking his teammates when they bicker or are annoying or are just basically not as cool as Jaffa, really working the word "indeed," displaying biceps of awesomeness, dispensing wisdom and handy knowledge, and, in his copious spare time, freeing the Jaffa and leading them to a glorious, false-god-free future. Also, he enjoys television and golf.

Sources of angst: He served a false god for a whole bunch of decades, in the process killing boodles of people and bringing sorrow to any number of planets. That's kind of a bummer, although he doesn't, you know, cry in the rain about it or anything. Also, he has very bad luck in relationships. Also, his people are slaves. Also, he's dependent on the evil alien larva living in what appears to be his lower intestine.

Methods of coping: Meditation, exercise, eating a balanced diet, and, one assumes, occasionally sneaking out of the Mountain in the dead of night to dress up in a Yeti costume and use alien technology on unsuspecting conspiracy theorists. Or, okay, probably not, but in his shoes, that's what I'd do.

Reasons we love him: He is made of awesome, he has sarcastic eyebrows, he manages to look cool even though he's got a giant gold tattoo on his forehead, he kicks nine kinds of ass, and he doesn't sweat the small stuff. Or the medium stuff. Or most things, really. Also, did I mention his biceps?

Fan fiction notes: He doesn't get a lot of action, sadly, but he seems to be shipped most often with Sam. If Teal'c is a flat, emotionless, silent, speechless, boring guy, then either he's been replaced with a block of wood (probably as part of a cunning plan, and I'm guessing this cunning plan would have been Daniel's idea), or you're reading badfic.

-The Team, v. 1.5-

This was only for season six, and it involved Jonas Quinn, about whom I know very little. I think he liked bananas. Beyond that, you'll need to ask someone else.

-The Team, v. 2.0-

I don't know much about v. 2.0 of the team, either. (Well, technically, I don't know much about any of SG1, but I'm writing this anyway. I enjoy exposing my ignorance! It's my main hobby.) Here's how I think about it: it looks like they added John Crichton (but in military costume) and Aeryn Sun (after a disturbing makeover), but in reality they added the original SG1 fanboy and a sort of chaotic neutral thief/sex beast in pigtails.

I think. I'm going to have to get back to you on this.

-The Major Bad Guys-

GOA'ULD: They are snake-like parasites, and they wants your bodies, precious! At least, they do if you are pretty and young and healthy. Good parts: you'll live a really long time. Bad parts: you'll be entirely controlled by an evil alien playing god to various planets. Also, you will be dressed in a lot of gold lame, and possibly also unfortunate accessories.

ORI: Like Scientologists, except their tech works.

REPLICATORS: A terrifying combination of nanotechnology and a Xerox machine with the "copy" button stuck down. For reasons that can only be indicative of pure evil, they tend to appear as spiders a lot, meaning I have to cover my eyes when they show up in vids.

NID: As far as I can tell, they're like the Stargate program would probably actually be if the U.S. government was running it.

-Selected Other Guys-

ASGARD: They are naked alien types who enjoy cosplay and cloning. One of them has a serious hard-on for Jack O'Neill, which is impressive, because as far as I can tell - and believe me, you could tell - he doesn't have any genitals per se. They have lots of technology, but mostly choose to be much less than helpful. Still, it's always good to have a little naked alien around. They come in handy in all kinds of situations. I keep one in my closet for that very reason.

ANCIENTS: You know those people you meet who explain to you about how their bodies are temples and they never touch any substances, and by substances they mean, like, chocolate, caffeine, tea, meat, dairy, and processed foods, and inevitably it ends up with them telling you in great detail about how healing and successful their latest colonic cleansing was, and you just want to smack them? Okay, maybe we mostly have those in California. But multiply them times a thousand and add in giant glowing squids, and you've got the Ancients. They ascended to a higher plane, and they cannot resist an opportunity to let you know it. ("Look how high we are!" they generally say. And then they probably tell you they don't even need colonic cleansings anymore, but one would really do you some good.) Sometimes, Daniel joins them, but they always send him back, possibly because they are afraid that if he sticks around Jack will join them. They can't be all spiritual and mighty, though, because they generally keep Daniel's clothes.

-Everyone Else-

Like I know. Ten seasons! They had fucking Merlin in here, for god's sake! Basically, if you can think of it, they probably did it at least once in the canon. Well, unless it involves blowjobs, but that's why we have fan fiction.

Plot You Need to Know

First, know this: I will not attempt to explain the canon. That requires trained professionals. Also massive sedatives. I will highlight certain points of the canon, but if you ask me to explain anything in a way that makes sense, I will just laugh helplessly. This is ten years of canon, of which I have seen not a single second. Ask someone who actually understands this stuff. (I will provide links to people who do.)

Okay, so there's this big stone circle-y thingy, and it's kind of an interplanetary toilet/telephone hybrid: you dial it and jump in and it flushes you through some hyperspace-type tubes (like the internet, only with whooshy noises!) to a new place.

The Air Force gets hold of it, and Daniel figures out how to use it, and he and Jack go through it and have adventures on Abydos. They learn that there is alien life out there, and most of it has terrible taste in clothing and the will to power. They blow shit up. Daniel gets married to Sherry (or whatever), and stays on the planet; Jack goes home and mopes for a year about, you know, kid dead, wife gone, hot anthropologist apparently straight, that kind of thing.

Then...look, stuff happens, okay? Point is, Daniel's wife (and Skaara, who is Sherry's brother, but he didn't get an apostrophe; maybe there was a shortage) gets a snake put in her head, and Daniel comes back to fight the Goa'uld, being just that kind of take-the-problem-to-the-top guy. Sam joins up. They meet Teal'c and Jack converts him to good with, basically, a persuasive look (why there is not more Jack/Teal'c I will never know). We can has SG1z!

SG1 goes traveling to various planets and starships and stuff. While there, these things may happen:
  • There is technology, mysterious, lethal, or important.
  • There are aliens. (In this world, humans who live on other planets are also aliens.)
  • SG1 gets itself into some trouble.
  • Trouble finds SG1 without any help from them.
  • SG1 gets itself out of some trouble.
  • Daniel dies.
Mix that up, and you've got - well, a lot of it, anyway.

But if there's one thing I've learned from my years in the various Gateverse fandoms, it's that you don't need to know the canon, because subtle visual clues are interwoven throughout that allow you to understand the scope and breadth of the entire universe. These clues are: hair.

-Ten Years of SG1 Summarized Entirely Via Hair-

Jack's hair turns gray overnight, presumably from the stress of herding this particular group of hyperactive Schrodinger's cats.

Daniel's hair gets progressively less floppy as time goes on, which might be an attempt on the hair department's part to reflect his character change and growth, but probably just means the actor got tired of using a comb.

Teal'c's hair consistently proves that less is more, except for that unfortunate experiment with hair growth that we all like to pretend never happened, because the alternative is tearing out our own eyes and wandering in the woods for twenty years.

Sam has good hair, but only in this universe; all other Sams were the victims of tragic hairstyling accidents.

Cameron has military hair. Actual military hair, on a military character. It's one of the wonders of the Stargate universe.

Vala changes her hairstyle like most people change their underpants. (We cannot say for sure if she has underpants; maybe she doesn't and she's compensating.)

No one can remember what Jonas's hair looked like.

Useful Resources

If you actually want to learn about Stargate: SG1, I suggest Arduinna's awesome Stargate Handbook, which has everything you could ever hope to know about the show.

There's also the Stargate Primer, which is kind of out-of-date, but is very useful if you're just getting into the fandom.

You'll be reading a lot about Jack and Daniel if you stick to the slash part of this fandom. If you want to know what they look like - and, um, why writers are so anxious to get their clothes off, and I don't mean that the way you think I do - check out niamaea's photo essays: Everybody's Crazy 'bout a Sharp-Dressed Man (Daniel) and Everybody's Crazy Strikes Back (Jack). Actually, check these out even if you couldn't care less about what Jack and Daniel look like. You'll never look at tablecloths and chinos the same way again.

Thanks to cofax7 and rydra_wong, I can link you to katie_m's Stargate Primer for Farscape Fans. Useful! Informative! Helps clear up some of the confusion caused by the casting of seasons 9 and 10! (The primer also works in the other direction, by the way - at least, it helped me figure out Farscape. It's a primer that swings both ways.)

A Fan Fiction Sampler

It is so impossibly difficult to pick a starter set of fan fiction for this show. There's just so much good in this fandom. The basic structure of the show - open a gate, tromp through, deal with what’s on the other side, return home in pieces, pick up the pieces, repeat - seems to allow FF writers to create plots and cultures as never before. And just generally put all this glorious stuff in their stories. (Including sex. Of course.) And then there's the characters, who lend themselves to snappy dialog and lots of humor - and lots and lots of angst.

So, the first step to finishing this FIHL is acknowledging that I just need to give you some idea of the awesomeness that's out there. (And only the vaguest idea, at that. I don't read a lot of the pairings in this fandom, so I can't really do anything even approaching a comprehensive survey.)

Reveille, by Shalott, aka astolat. Daniel Jackson/Jack O'Neill.

As I've said before, this story sucks people into SG1 fandom so fast that sometimes it happens in the middle of conversations. You'll just be casually chatting to a fangirl, and then there's a WHOMP, and suddenly she's in SG1 fandom. That's pretty much what happened to me, anyway. (Not to worry; the WHOMPing doesn't leave marks, except, you know, a sudden love of a new fandom.)

Why? Well, this story is fun. And it really shows off the delightful perfection of the Jack and Daniel dynamic (and why it's so very appealing to turn that into a Jack/Daniel dynamic). There's intoxication and telepathy and humor. And, best of all, you need no canon knowledge to read it. The first time I read this, I'm pretty sure I still thought Sam was a boy. So, seriously: it's a delightful romp with no prerequisites besides a love of slash. Why aren't you reading it already?

The Other Half, by Anna S., aka eliade.

This one's another sucks-you-in story; many a fangirl has lost her Stargate virginity to Anna S., and trust me, it's a good way to go. Anna knows how to show you - and Jack and Daniel - a good time.

And there's just so much to love in this story. I mean, there's Jack first-person narrative - no, seriously, don't run screaming; this may just be the best use of first person I've seen in fan fiction. It's that good. (And, for this story, really kind of necessary.) There's unfortunate and gaudy jewelry, which is something of a canonical theme, so it's nice to see it here. And there's slavery, which is not, in itself, an awesome concept, but trust me: on Jack O'Neill, it looks good.

You don't need to know the canon to read this; you just need to love slash. (And if you've got a thing for sarcasm, costume jewelry, and a little BDSM? This story is made for you.) This is the slavefic that slavefic haters love; this is the first-person narrative story that first-person-haters love. This, in short, is something you should read right now.

Commodity, by keiko_kirin. Gen, according to the author. (Some readers may view it otherwise.)

Every one of Keiko's SG1 stories is worth reading, but this one works particularly well as an introduction to what the FF of SG1 has to offer. Because - okay, in many ways, this could be an episode. SG1 visits an alien culture, gets into trouble, gets out. And I love the way the team works together in this; for much of it, they're separate, but they still think and function as a unit, and I love that.

But there's also - well, put it this way. I think there's a reason this story isn't a romance, even though the author could easily have made it so: it shouldn't be. There's too much other important stuff going on, and it's too much about the team and the culture they find - romance just doesn't fit in here. And that's why this is perfect to include as an intro both to SG1 (because, seriously, these people do not have time for the more fun parts of life; hell, I'm surprised they manage to shower regularly) and the gen side of this fandom's fiction, which typically goes much deeper than the show itself can.

(By the way - if you're curious about what Keiko can do with slash, get thee to The Road Between the Walls, which is another fabulous Stargate adventure, with all the slash and alien cultures and plot you could ever hope for.)

First Impressions, by Pares, aka kormantic. Daniel Jackson/Jack O'Neill.

I talk so much about Daniel dying - well, and there's so much of it in the canon - that I figured I'd better recommend at least one story in which he does just that. In this, Daniel is dead: to begin with. Except there is definitely some doubt about that. (Sorry. Couldn't help it.) Which makes this really the perfect dead-Daniel story, because as many times as he dies in the canon, well, he's also still alive in the canon, and that's not because he's a sun-resistant vampire or a very linguistically gifted zombie. For Daniel, death is kind of like a truck stop: a mildly unpleasant place you have to go through on your way to somewhere else.

So, Daniel spends some time sitting in the parking lot of his metaphorical truck stop in this story. And, as always, he does not let death, certain or indefinite or simply improbable, stand in the way of his greatest natural gift, which is causing trouble for his team, and especially for one Jack O'Neill.

Plus, they all go to Vegas. And Jack and Daniel have sex. And Pares reveals the light-hearted side of two things many people fear (for good reasons, let me add): death and casinos. I really don't see how you could ask for better.

Elvis Has Left the Building, by Salieri, aka troyswann. Daniel Jackson/Jack O'Neill.

I love humor. You show me a story that will make me laugh and I will be your adoring slave for life. (Or, okay, until I get distracted by the next funny thing. I can't help it. I'm easily swayed.) And when I found this story - well, I remember I'd been reading through a siege of really great but really painful SG1 stories, and wondering if maybe this wasn't the fandom for me, and then I found this, and I realized that it so was. Because any fandom that can contain both this story and the brilliant but painful The Cost of a Used Spaceship (by Marie Blackpool) is most definitely a fandom for me.

What we have here is - well, a great team story, for one thing. Because nothing brings a team together like getting routinely outmaneuvered by a moose, am I right? And - but what else do I need to tell you? SG1 + Moose = awesome beyond all words. It's fun, it's funny, and there's no prior canon knowledge necessary. Go for it.

Rings, by Tallulah Rasa. Gen.

As I think I said somewhere way up there, one of the hard things about writing any kind of introduction to SG1 is - well, ten years of canon. It's very complicated. And these characters do change over the years; even I could not possibly confuse season 10 Daniel with season 1 Daniel (I mean in a characterization sense, although in fact I couldn't confuse them in a physical sense, either - it's much easier to confuse season 10 Daniel with Cameron than with his own earlier self). So, it's like I'm trying to show you the elephant just by letting you pat its trunk.

This story is my attempt to remedy that: it's snapshots (neatly labeled by season, which helps) of SG1 as they grow, change, and move through and then beyond the canon. The dialog - well, this is how I hear SG1 when they talk in my head (oh, shut up - like characters don't talk to you all the time, and if they don't, I don't want to hear about it). It's perfect. And it gives you what I couldn't, a sense of growth and progression.

Plus, the central metaphor, if I may slip into Pretend English Major Mode for a second, is trees, which is very appropriate. See, one thing you learn from SG1 - from the vids, from the canon, from the screenshots, even - is that the universe looks a lot like British Columbia: full of trees. So I'm finishing on a story that is a lot like the universe, really.

(...Wow. I'm so deep.)

Want More? SG-1 Recommendations Sites

It's been a long time since I used any SG1 recs pages, actually. But even if I haven't used these, I've checked them out, and I've liked what I've seen. If that gives you any kind of confidence at all.

Polyamorous Recs: Stargate: SG-1, by nestra and shrift. The gold standard of multi-fandom recommendation.

Stargate: SG-1 recs, by norah. MMWD provides lots and lots of links with short summaries - perfect if you're looking to glut yourself on quality fan fiction, in other words.

Stargate: SG-1 recs, by thefourthvine (me). I'm kind of the opposite of MMWD; I provide very few links and I talk and talk and talk about each one. (And if you got all the way through this post and you don't know that, well...) Basically, I'm only including myself in this list because I wrote this post; the other sites will serve you better if you're just getting into the fandom.

Princess Cimorene's Stargate recs, by cimness. (Scroll down; the SG-1 comes under the Atlantis stuff.) Cim provides short summaries and lots of links to great stories, and - rarest of rare - she'll tell you what she didn't like about a story she's recommending.

The Rec Room: SG-1, by cupidsbow. This site (okay, journal-thing) is incredibly useful, not the least because cupidsbow recs vids as well as fan fiction. That's a rare and wondrous thing. And her taste is great.

Arduinna's Recs: Stargate SG-1, by aka_arduinna. Arduinna's devoted to this fandom, as her SG Handbook indicates, and she provides consistent recommendations with longer, more detailed summaries.

Destina's Slash Story Recommendations, by destina. If you're looking for the angstier, darker, or more bittersweet side of this fandom, this is where to go. This page hasn't been updated in a while and is most likely dead, but there are still lots of great stories here, some of which you won't find other places.

ETA: katie_m has provided helpful links to sites with good het (Jack/Sam) recommendations in the comments. Yay!

And rydra_wong has some further recs site suggestions here. Double yay!
fictionbya: Stargate - Not as heterosexualfictionbya on June 26th, 2007 07:23 am (UTC)
XD Brilliant! SG1 and I have been on-again off-again for pretty much its entire run. Can't say I am terribly "fannish" about it (only one icon, so sad), haven't seen the whole show, and I sure as heck can't keep any of the canon straight. Yeah, I don't know who Martouf is either. But this whole post was great and I'm gonna scope some fic.

ORI: Like Scientologists, except their tech works.

So needs to be an icon, LOL.
tried to eat the safe banana: SG1thefourthvine on June 26th, 2007 08:08 am (UTC)
Yeah, I don't know who Martouf is either.

Here's what I know about Martouf:

1. He's from another planet.
2. Sam dated him.
3. And then something bad happened.

Not much help, is it?

I'm gonna scope some fic

(no subject) - feanna on June 26th, 2007 02:41 pm (UTC) (Expand)
(no subject) - fictionbya on July 1st, 2007 09:12 pm (UTC) (Expand)
abbyleeabbylee on June 26th, 2007 07:36 am (UTC)
♥ ♥ ♥

ORI: Like Scientologists, except their tech works.

p.s. John Crichton.
tried to eat the safe banana: SG1thefourthvine on June 26th, 2007 08:10 am (UTC)
Ooops! Fixed. (It's just, you know, 30% of fandom's guys are named Jack, and 25% are named John, and I get confused sometimes.)

Thank you for pointing that out. I really like John Crichton, and the poor man has enough problems without name confusion.
lynnmonsterlynnmonster on June 26th, 2007 07:38 am (UTC)
I *laughed out loud*, for reals, reading this. And you NEVER EVEN ONCE mentioned that Jack O'Neill is MacGyver.

I think one of my favorite stories in this fandom (aside from The Other Half, which, wow, sold me on so many things, slash fandom included, that I wasn't entirely certain about at the time), is Sinner's Grove, horrible and violating as it is.
tried to eat the safe banana: SG1thefourthvine on June 26th, 2007 08:14 am (UTC)
And you NEVER EVEN ONCE mentioned that Jack O'Neill is MacGyver.

This is because I have only a vague idea of who MacGyver was. He...fixed things, right? And had bad hair. I mean, I understand Jack O'Neill also used to be on a soap opera, and I have about the same level of knowledge about that.

I think one of my favorite stories in this fandom (aside from The Other Half, which, wow, sold me on so many things, slash fandom included, that I wasn't entirely certain about at the time), is Sinner's Grove, horrible and violating as it is.

Oh, god, Sinner's Grove is so incredibly good, on so many levels. I sometimes, in my darker moments, refer to SG1 as the fandom that made me love rapefic, and when I say that, I'm basically talking about Sinner's Grove. God, that story is just - it's dark and horrible but it's also about how you pick up, how you go on, how SG1 survives, and I love that so much. And I love the way it explores the real possibilities of the SG world, which is something we've always had to rely on FF to do.

...And, you know, I'm having a hard time imagining you in your slash-doubting days. I missed your formative years, and now you're all grown up! *sniffles emotionally*
(no subject) - lynnmonster on June 26th, 2007 08:43 am (UTC) (Expand)
(no subject) - thefourthvine on June 26th, 2007 05:18 pm (UTC) (Expand)
(Deleted comment)
(no subject) - reginagiraffe on June 26th, 2007 03:25 pm (UTC) (Expand)
(no subject) - thefourthvine on June 26th, 2007 05:23 pm (UTC) (Expand)
bluevsgreybluevsgrey on June 26th, 2007 07:41 am (UTC)
I find this hilarious because:

(1) I have seen almost all of Stargate:SG1 cannon [with the exception of the series finale and a couple of episodes in season ten] and am having to think really hard to get what you are trying to reference, probably because I have never really read any Stargate:SG1 fanfiction. Be assured that if I ever get the desire this will be the first place I look.

(2) I had a serious 'WTF?' moment upon seeing this because I had thought that you had already done SG1, after SGA.

(3) It is three am and I got six hours of sleep last night.

(4) Your tone is humorous. I envy it.

tried to eat the safe banana: SG1thefourthvine on June 26th, 2007 11:57 am (UTC)
I have never really read any Stargate:SG1 fanfiction.

This is a sad thing! (In my world, anyway.) Is there anything I can rec that might convince you to start?

Ooo, how about vids? Vids are a nice canon-fandom bridge. (And they're where I got a lot of the stuff above - like the Jonas Quinn/bananas thing. Informative! Shiny! Short!)

I had thought that you had already done SG1, after SGA.

Sadly, no. But, well, I got it done. Eventually.

It is three am and I got six hours of sleep last night.

I feel your pain, totally. It is five a.m. I haven't been to sleep yet. I need to be up in three hours. I have a feeling tonight will be a big win for the insomnia. *bonds with fellow sleepless person*

Your tone is humorous. I envy it.

Thank you!
(no subject) - bluevsgrey on June 27th, 2007 02:07 am (UTC) (Expand)
PICK MY TEETH WITH A DINOSAUR BONE-AGE: can't get away from the idiotboxmanasseh on June 26th, 2007 08:01 am (UTC)
SG is one of the few shows that I can claim to have 90% of, yet cannot keep the canon straight in my head at ALL. It is brain-twisting.

Still, I love the fic like woah.
PICK MY TEETH WITH A DINOSAUR BONE-AGE: spn // deeeeeeanmanasseh on June 26th, 2007 08:02 am (UTC)
icon of great manpain = appropriate for word errors y/y
...claim to have SEEN 90% of, jeez. That'll teach me to stay up all night and then comment on stuff.
(no subject) - thefourthvine on June 26th, 2007 11:59 am (UTC) (Expand)
the way of tea and failure: fairytale of new capricacarla_scribbles on June 26th, 2007 08:06 am (UTC)
"Chaotic neutral thief/sex beast in pigtails" may be the Best Description Ever. (And I do not believe Vala has underpants. Vala and underpants go together like Gaius Baltar and sanity. I have never actually sat through an entire episode of any Stargate at all, but some things one just knows.)
tried to eat the safe banana: SG1thefourthvine on June 26th, 2007 12:04 pm (UTC)
And I do not believe Vala has underpants. Vala and underpants go together like Gaius Baltar and sanity.


Well. I could easily believe that Vala has recreational underpants. Or underpants that serve as a secret storage location for contraband. Just - she does not seem the type for, you know, the kind that function only and solely as underpants.

(Or maybe that leather stuff you sometimes see caps of her in - maybe that's her underwear. It would make sense. I mean, why bother with all the hassle of multiple layers?)
(no subject) - slantwisehumour on June 26th, 2007 12:34 pm (UTC) (Expand)
(no subject) - rydra_wong on June 26th, 2007 02:58 pm (UTC) (Expand)
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tried to eat the safe banana: SG1thefourthvine on June 26th, 2007 12:17 pm (UTC)
Replicators: are evil lego.

YES. PRECISELY. Evil Lego of shudder.

By substances they also mean cooked food, I think.

Oh, most definitely. Also all carbohydrates (POISON!), so they would never consider eating a potato.

I mean, I love raw veggies as much as - and often quite a bit more than - the next girl. But sometimes I want to put my species' acquisition of fire to good use, okay?

But, you know, I'm fine with whatever people want to eat, as long as they do not expect me to cater to their more extreme food weirdnesses. (My motto is: if you have more than five separate restrictions on your diet, you should probably bring your own food.) But when they lecture me on my eating habits, I get somewhat less fine, and when they start describing in detail their colonic cleansings, I get very much less than fine. I DON'T NEED TO KNOW. Some things shouldn't be shared!

Selected other good guys:

Ooo, I like your selected other good guys. I was trying to keep the length down, as it got somewhat unwieldy, but you're absolutely right that Janet at least should've been in there, especially as she's part of a major pairing.

Also Hammond. I really liked him. I have no special feel for Landry yet.

Job duties: administering alien parasite methadone, enforcing unenforcable quarantines, curing entirely new alien plagues, monitoring gate teams for alien possession.

So, basically, consistently performing medical miracles against time.

Head honcho

...of a top secret loony bin.

he was turned into a caveman once. He got better.

See, this is why I cannot write the supporting character descriptions. I didn't know that!

I probably would've put down baldness as his primary source of angst, although perhaps he enjoys being shiny. It is definitely a good look for him; he has at least 40% more authority because of it.
(no subject) - feanna on June 26th, 2007 02:34 pm (UTC) (Expand)
Wyoming Knott: sg1 by newkidfanwyomingnot on June 26th, 2007 10:53 am (UTC)
Have I mentioned lately how much I adore you?

I needed this kickstart to my day. Thank you.

Better still, you rec'd stuff I haven't read yet! And provided reclist links I didn't have!

I consumed the entirety of SG canon in three months. I have the big stuff down. But the details can be kinda sketchy. I know Martouf, but I didn't know who you meant by "the guy with the banana" until you mentioned team 1.5, and then I was all *facepalm* because duh. Jonas Quinn ate all the damn time (seriously, in one episode, he spent the entire episode eating. Even dipping fries in his chocolate shake). Yes, he's an alien. But you knew that, right?

So, big gold star for tfv today. :)

(and damn. I still owe you a MacGyverish drabble.)
tried to eat the safe banana: SG1thefourthvine on June 26th, 2007 12:22 pm (UTC)

Thank you!

*buffs gold star*

Even dipping fries in his chocolate shake

I am scarred forever by this knowledge. FOREVER. Oh my god EW. *shudders*

I consumed the entirety of SG canon in three months.

I heard a rumor that, when Ben Browder got the job, he consumed the entire SG canon then existing in like two weeks. I have never been so impressed with an actor's devotion to duty. Or the durability of his eyeballs. And brain.

I still owe you a MacGyverish drabble.

You're very busy, and I'm very patient, so no worries at all. The drabble will come when it comes.
(no subject) - cofax7 on June 26th, 2007 03:03 pm (UTC) (Expand)
Katie M.katie_m on June 26th, 2007 11:43 am (UTC)
D'awwww. This made me smile. Poor little Asgard woobies, man. I hope Thor went fishing with Jack sometime.

splash_the_cat has a bunch of themed rec sites that get into the S/J, as well as threesomes, apocafic, and Sam. nandamai also recs stuff that includes S/J.
tried to eat the safe banana: SG1thefourthvine on June 26th, 2007 12:26 pm (UTC)
Glad to have made you smile. (And I am flatly refusing to believe a certain Asgard-related spoiler. *waves magic wand of canon denial* See? All better!)

And, oo, thank you for the recs of recs sites. I have no handle on the het side of this fandom, so I couldn't even evaluate the few sites with het recs that google found for me. This is useful information!
(no subject) - rydra_wong on June 26th, 2007 04:56 pm (UTC) (Expand)
talislady: chocoladetalislady on June 26th, 2007 12:24 pm (UTC)
Woohoo! Stargate!
Joy! No choking required!

It's funny to see the show through the eyes of someone who hasn't seen any actual episodes. Fandom through fan fiction gives you a unique perspective. In this case fandom is actually closer to canon than a newbie might believe ("Daniel dies a lot? Yeah right!").
tried to eat the safe banana: SG1thefourthvine on June 26th, 2007 12:32 pm (UTC)
Re: Woohoo! Stargate!
Fandom through fan fiction gives you a unique perspective.

This is very true. I try to remain alert for fanon, but it's always a challenge. (It's a fun challenge, though. Like a puzzle, figuring out the canon by triangulating from fan fiction and fanon.) But I do think that one of the reasons that this FIHL took forever to finish was that, well, I haven't seen any of the canon. So this is truly just an intro to the fandom. And I kept trying to explain stuff and then I realized - I don't understand this! I don't know it! I can't possibly explain it to others. So I'm afraid it probably looked, um, a little crazed to someone who actually already knows this stuff.
cad27 on June 26th, 2007 12:26 pm (UTC)
I was totally wondering about FIHL the other day as it remains my deepest most favouritest part of your journal. And lo, I have but to think and it shall appear. I consider this a joyous sign.

I'm almost disappointed you didn't rec the Jack/Thor though. And by almost, I mean both virulently and definitely not disappointed; its not something you do to the unwary.
tried to eat the safe banana: SG1thefourthvine on June 26th, 2007 12:35 pm (UTC)

I'm not sure if I should be asking you to wonder about FIHL more often or forbidding you ever to think of them again.

I'm almost disappointed you didn't rec the Jack/Thor though.

Well. But - this is presumably for newbies to the fandom, and I think you need to be a bit more steeped in it for that particular pairing.

But if I had done vids, I was so going to rec "Something to Talk About," newbies or not. I love that vid with an unholy passion.
(no subject) - cad27 on June 27th, 2007 12:19 pm (UTC) (Expand)
marycrawford on June 26th, 2007 12:43 pm (UTC)
Woo! Loved the post, as I love all your FIHL posts. Plus this one comes with such great timing, what with me threatening to visit therienne and aka_arduinna before VVC and them threatening to educate me about SG-1. (I know what that means. I just hope they don't strap my eyelids open.)

Sometimes, Daniel joins them, but they always send him back, possibly because they are afraid that if he sticks around Jack will join them.

*cracks up* That's fabulous, and now I want a story where that happens and Jack annoys the crap out of the Ascended until they send him back in self-defense. Is there such a story, do you know?

I've read here and there in SG-1 fic, but I think at least half of your recs are new to me, thanks! And thanks especially for the link to the fashion photo essays, they are fabulous & inspiring.
tried to eat the safe banana: Secret societiesthefourthvine on June 26th, 2007 05:32 pm (UTC)
I just hope they don't strap my eyelids open.

Just, you know, a warning: I've been re-watching Walking on the Ground a lot lately, so I know they have Clockwork Orange handy to use as a model. I would be afraid, were I you. (But be educated about SG1 voluntarily, and then maybe they won't have to go that route! Because, okay, I can't make promises about the canon - um, obviously - but the fan fiction is wonderful.)

That's fabulous, and now I want a story where that happens and Jack annoys the crap out of the Ascended until they send him back in self-defense. Is there such a story, do you know?

You know, there kind of is. Sort of. (There are several Jack-ascends stories, but one in particular that kind of meets your specs, here.) Remind me and I'll dig it out from my links. (It will take some excavation, I think, because I don't remember the author or the title. Poop. But it will be the fun kind of excavating.)

I've read here and there in SG-1 fic, but I think at least half of your recs are new to me, thanks! And thanks especially for the link to the fashion photo essays, they are fabulous & inspiring.


And you've started doing the same for Hercules, I see. YAY! (Although what that fandom really needs is someone to explore, via photoessay, the headgear. Best Beloved has many theories about the headwear of the supporting cast in that show (including the theory that this is where they spent their production money). And, well, I've seen some of the things they put on people's heads in that show. I have to think she may be right.)
(no subject) - green_grrl on June 29th, 2007 05:12 am (UTC) (Expand)
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tried to eat the safe banana: Smilethefourthvine on June 26th, 2007 05:34 pm (UTC)

The Ori confused me at first - I don't handle change well, so I was all, "But - Goa'uld! What of the Goa'uld? They can't go away now; I just learned how to spell their name!" And then I realized what the Ori really were - Scientologists! With working tech! - and I have been comfortable with them (in the OH GOD NO GET AWAY sense) ever since.
tesserae_ on June 26th, 2007 12:59 pm (UTC)
Brilliant! I love Atlantis for all I'm worth but SG1 always makes me wonder what, exactly, the tiny people are doing and why I don't care more...although I've enjoyed the last two years with Vala and Cameron.

Have you done Farscape in this series?
tried to eat the safe banana: TFV bluethefourthvine on June 26th, 2007 05:38 pm (UTC)
Oh, I adore Atlantis and SG-1 both. I am bigateual, I guess. In the fan fiction sense, anyway; obviously, I am not exactly a canon queen.

Have you done Farscape in this series?

Nope. (And, oh god, if I ever do, I am so not attempting to list John Crichton's sources of angst. The world would run out of bytes. They weren't exactly kind to the characters on that show, were they?)
cupidsbowcupidsbow on June 26th, 2007 01:19 pm (UTC)
I love your fandom overviews. This one is awesome. It reminded me of so many wondeful things. My housemate and I are re-watching SG1 from ep 1 at the moment. We're about halfway through season one so far--which is about as bad as I remember. Thank god it gets better. :)

Also? I loved Jonas. Especially wet; it's a good look for him, and I can totally see why Jack asked him on the team! I wish there was more decent fic about him.

Thanks for the rec too. I have so many SG recs sitting in my To Rec folder. It's daunting.
tried to eat the safe banana: SG1thefourthvine on June 26th, 2007 05:42 pm (UTC)
Thank god it gets better.

At what point does it get better? I'm curious; possibly Best Beloved can be bribed to watch it with a promise of a getting-better part.

I loved Jonas. Especially wet; it's a good look for him, and I can totally see why Jack asked him on the team! I wish there was more decent fic about him.

See, but that's just it: there's really hardly any FF about him at all (though there is some; in this fandom, there's FF about everyone, I think), so he's like a total cipher to me. This is what I get for experiencing the canon only at a remove: I only get to know about the parts that interest FF writers.

It's daunting.

*checks Old Recs Database for SG1 stories*

*checks del.icio.us for SG1 tags*

*adds up total*

*is, indeed, quite daunted*

Yeah, I hear you, sister. *bonds*